TL;DR – This is the end of the year, so let’s take a look back at the year that was by examining twenty categories across cinema, ranging from exquisite to the obscured and all between

Awards –

 

It is the end of the year (well a bit later than that but life happened) and while I will have the traditional Best of 2017 and Worst of 2017 lists, I have found that both of those lists miss some of the important facets that make films work, or not work. To eligible for these awards, they simply had to be a film I reviewed in 2017, and there may be some notable absences simply because we have not got those films here yet. So in Part 2 of 4, we look at five different categories that deal with the cinema of 2017.

• The films that just didn’t quite work
• The best line of dialogue in cinema
• Movie trends that I am really sick of
• The grossest moments I had to sit through
• The films I will go to bat for

So let’s dive into TL;DR Movie Review’s Awards of 2017 Part 2

 

Every year there are those films that almost were amazing but just didn’t quite get there. Maybe there is a disconnect between the visuals and the story, maybe they didn’t quite get the tone right, maybe there is a performance that just doesn’t work, maybe the script needed some more work, or one of a number of other reasons. Whatever the case, these were films that were close but no cigar, And The Nominees Are:

Assassin’s Creed – Good cast and visuals but no narrative consistency
Bright – Interesting concept, lousy script
Ghost in the Shell – Smashing the visuals of the film with the story of SAC
Passengers – There is a compelling story here that was lost in the edit
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets – One of the most engaging first 5 minutes in cinema and then does nothing with it.

And The Winner is:

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets – One of the most engaging first 5 minutes in cinema and then does nothing with it.

Now it is not surprising that all of these films are genre films, which is science fiction and fantasy. That’s because they are usually the films that swing for the fences, and it does not always work, but at least it is interesting in the process. Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is a fascinating concept, it has spectacular visuals, and has the potential to be a film series that lasts into the ages. There is just one problem, they cast or created two of the most unlikable characters in cinema this year. Laureline and Valerian have zero chemistry as a couple and are unbelievable as a team, indeed the only time the film works is when they are separated. I don’t know if it was the directing, the script, or the acting, but what could have been fantastic was instead a bit of a mess.

 

 

Film dialogue, or at least good film dialogue is all about a rhythm, you have two or more people conversing and it has to feel both natural, but also has to convey everything the film needs the audience to know. Is the conversation a contest, is it a flirtatious tease, are people trying to hide their motives, are they happy to see someone, is it a call to action? No matter the case, good film dialogue brings you into the world, it makes you laugh, it cuts you to the core, or puts you in a sense of unease, and it is a joy to watch when you see it. And The Nominees Are:

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle – ‘Oh my God! These things are crazy!’ (Jake Kasdan, Chris McKenna, Erik Sommers, Scott Rosenberg & Jeff Pinkner)
Kong: Skull Island – “This is a good group of boys. We’re all gonna die together out here. You’re a good group of boys to die with, I’ll tell you that much. [laughing] You shouldn’t have come here.” (Dan Gilroy, John Gatins & Max Borenstein)
Thor: Ragnarok – “Oh my god, the hammer pulled you off?” (Craig Kyle, Christopher Yost & Eric Pearson)
Thor: Ragnarok – “Hey! Hey! We know each other, he’s a friend from work!” (Craig Kyle, Christopher Yost & Eric Pearson)
War of the Planet of the Apes – “Apes, Together, Strong” (Mark Bomback & Matt Reeve)

And The Winner Is:

Thor: Ragnarok – “Oh my god, the hammer pulled you off?” (Craig Kyle, Christopher Yost & Eric Pearson)

There should be no surprise at this point that Taika Waititi knows how to bring out the most of his script and actors, and Thor: Ragnarok is no exception. This is a beautifully fun film from start to end, and there are so many wonderful lines that most of this category could have just been taken just from Ragnarok. To highlight this our snippet of dialogue comes from a much larger conversation and it is all gold.

Thor: Quite unique. It was made from this special metal from the heart of a dying star. And when I spun it really, really fast it gave me the ability to fly.
Korg: You rode a hammer?
Thor: No, I didn’t ride the hammer
Korg: The hammer ride you on your back?
Thor: No, I would spin it really fast and it would pull me off the…
Korg: Oh my god, the hammer pulled you off?
Thor: The ground! It would pull me off the ground, into the air and I would fly.
Thor: Every time I threw it, it would always come back.
Korg: Sounds like you had a pretty special and intimate relationship with this hammer and that losing it was almost comparable to losing a loved one.
Thor: That’s a nice way to put it.

 

 

While 2017 was overall a great year for film, there were a number of trends that did take away from the industry throughout the year. In this category, we take stock of these failures as a way of asking the industry to do better in 2018. Now we are not saying that these are things that have only happened in 2017, but they were noticeable, And The Nominees Are: (also some spoilers) 

 

Baywatch, Spider-Man: Homecoming, (and well about half the films I reviewed this year) – Trailers Ruining The Third Act Of The Film
Blade Runner 2049, Doctor Who, Kingsman: The Golden Circle & Thor: Ragnarok – Trailers Ruining A Character Reveal/Story Moment That Should Have Been A Surprise
John Wick: Chapter 2, The Lego Batman Movie & Lady Bird – Super Late Aussie Film Release Dates
Justice League – Henry Cavill’s Uncanny Valley Face
Resident Evil: The Final Chapter – A Thousand Cuts to Put Together An Action Sequence

And The Winner Is:

Blade Runner 2049, Doctor Who, Kingsman: The Golden Circle & Thor: Ragnarok – Trailers Ruining A Character Reveal/Story Moment That Should Have Been A Surprise

 

So look I already railed about Aussie Release dates HERE, and let’s be honest the digitally removing a moustache is not a common problem, though WB/DC you thought to go for a clean faced Henry Cavill over a bearded Henry Cavill was a good idea … well, that was a big mistake. No, there have been several times this year where moments or character were revealed in trailers that the surprise of them being there was integral to the story. Imagine watching Thor with no knowledge that his hammer Mjølnir was about to get crushed, or seeing Season 10 of Doctor Who with no knowledge that John Simms was going to pop up. Look I know, trailers have to get bums in seats, and name dropping is a big part of doing that, but they can do that without showing the key narrative moments if they put some effort into it.

 

 

It might be that I have seen more films this year than I have in the past, and that I was trying to broaden the type of films I watch, but I saw a number of films that were deeply unsettling. This is not necessarily a bad thing, when you use that tension, that discomfort constructively … well … this is not the case with the following films. If I am to be honest with you, these are moments in films that I probably would have walked out on if I was not reviewing them. And The Nominees Are: (also some spoilers) 

A Cure for Wellness – Attempted Incest Rape With A Face Melting Off
A Cure for Wellness – The Dentist Scene
Fist Fight – Teacher Creeping On A Student Like It Is No Big Thing
mother! – Literal Transubstantiation
The Killing of a Sacred Deer – Children Trying To Get Their Parents To Murder The Other Child to Save Themselves

And The Winner Is:

A Cure for Wellness – Attempted Incest Rape With A Face Melting Off

Now, mother! and The Killing of a Sacred Deer were very close to winning this award, but I have to give it to the film that is both equal parts gross and boring. After a long, long trudge through to the end of the film, A Cure for Wellness takes a deep dive into unpleasantness. We find out that Volmer and Hannah are father and daughter and part of a cult of immortality. Then to keep the bloodlines ‘pure’ he decided to impregnate his own daughter, in a very confronting scene, oh did I mention that his face is a mask to cover gooey burnt mass beneath it and well … look people walked out of my showing, and I wish I had gone with them.

 

 

Every year there are films that end up on worst films lists that are perfectly fine, or in fact actually quite good, they are just targeted at a different audience (and yes I know this is true about my worst film lists as much as anyone else’s). So we take a look at those films that yes I will go to bat for if need be. And The Nominees Are:

Kong: Skull Island
Monster Trucks
Power Rangers

And The Winner Is:

Kong: Skull Island

Ok yes, I’ll admit there is some clunky dialogue at times, and maybe the story could have used another pass before production, but I don’t care. It had compelling character performances led by John C. Reilly and Samuel L. Jackson. They filmed in beautiful locations across Asia and Australia which were the perfect backdrop for the story they wanted to tell. As well as this, Industrial Light and Magic brought their A-Game with the creature creation. Seriously, like Kong’s fur looked burnt, wet, whatever they needed it to be. It was also full of anime references and it is clear that the whole production team was putting their all into this film. Look you can be critical all you want but you will never be the Director Jordan Vogt-Roberts being critical about his own film critical.

So this is the end of Part 2, you can see Part 1, Part 3, and Part 4, as well as our Best of 2017 and Worst of 2017 over the coming days.

By Brian MacNamara: You can follow Brian on Twitter Here, when he’s not chatting about Movies and TV, he’ll be talking about International Relations, or the Solar System.

What are your favourite cinematic moments from 2017?, let us know what you thought in the comments below, feel free to share this review on any of the social medias and you can follow us Here. Check out all our past reviews and articles Here, and have a happy day. 

 

Credits – All insert images were created by the author, yep you just sat through the holiday pictures from my time in New Zealand, the banner credits are the actors, filmmakers, and production companies of the respective films