The Get Out – Movie Review

TL;DR – A profoundly odd slow-burn film that I am not sure lands its bombastic conclusion.

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is a mid-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid for the Amazon Prime subscription used to watch this film.

Russell Crowe sitting down in an yellow jumpsuit listing to headphones.

The Get Out Review Introduction

If you were going to ask who is the best export that Australia has ever given to Hollywood, then I would have to say that Russell Crowe needs to be in that conversation. If nothing else, the man is always working, bringing all of himself into the roles he plays, no matter how small or weird they may be. Today we are looking at a film that might be a good example of this, as we dive into the seedy underbelly of the Gold Coast … I mean Los Angeles.

So, to set the scene, Marco Kapak (Russell Crowe) is a man from Albania who has run a nightclub in America for decades. It was a lucrative career, until a ‘cardiac event’ stops him in his tracks at a most inopportune time. He is finally taking the advice of his girlfriend, Sunny (Teresa Palmer), to sell the nightclub and move to a nice small house in Thailand. The only problem is that Kapak has fingers in many pies, not all of them legal, and they all need to be untangled. Some of them might not want to be untangled.

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Wildcat – Movie Review

TL;DR – It has all the building blocks for a fascinating film, but it needed some more time in the oven before it was ready. 

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid for the Amazon Prime subscription used to watch this film.

London burning.

Wildcat Review Introduction

Some days you feel like falling into a comfort genre, and for me, that is a solid heist film. I love the construction, the action, and the aftermath. Add in the physicality of Kate Beckinsale and Lewis Tan, set it in the London underground, and frankly you have all the foundation you need for something interesting. I hope.

So, to set the scene, there is a new gang, the Mushka, threatening the balance of power between the two former kings of London’s underground: Christina Vine (Alice Krige) and Frasier Mahoney (Charles Dance). In the middle of this brewing civil war, Ada (Kate Beckinsale) leads a team including Roman (Lewis Tan) and Edward (Rasmus Hardiker) into robbing Ms Vine’s jewel vault. Because someone has kidnapped her daughter Charlotte (Isabelle Moxley), starting the civil war might be the cover they need to get her back.   

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Coyote vs. Acme – Movie Review

TL;DR – A delightfully fun time that did something I never thought possible; it made me care about the Coyote.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid to watch this film.

A Rocket Skates blueprint.

Coyote vs. Acme Review Introduction

Today I have the joy of reviewing a film that almost was lost to time, buried as a tax write-off by a company that chose profit over what has turned out to be a common-sense business choice given how well the film has done. But the tax write-off was the film’s past; the new theatrical run is its future, and I am here today to talk about that future.

So, to set the scene, Wile E. Coyote (Himself) has spent an age trying to catch and eat the Road Runner (Eric Bauza/Paul Julian) using just about every ACME contraption known to man and toon alike. His latest gambit involves magnetic gloves, rocket boots, some metallic baubles, and of course a lot of bird seed. It fails, like catastrophically. But out of his defeat, he sees a TV ad for Kevin Avery (Will Forte), a lawyer from Avery, Jones & Maltese who specialises in Toon disaster cases. However, what Avery really specialises in is doing as little as possible and getting an automatic small outcome for his clients so as to never ruffle those ACME feathers. However, when Wile E. Coyote dumps every failed ACME product into the evidence box, Avery, Jones & Maltese suddenly finds itself suing the biggest corporation in the world for every defective toon product ACME has ever made. Thus, Avery is now a very famous lawyer and is completely unprepared for the wrath that is Buddy Crane (John Cena).

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The Weight – Movie Review

TL;DR – A truly immersive film that sucks you into its story and makes you feel the titular weight.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Warning – Contains scenes with flashing lights.

Disclosure – I paid to watch this film.

Bars of Gold.

The Weight Review Introduction

Today was cheap Tuesday at the cinemas, and for the first time in an age I had nothing on in the evening. Well, when the universe lines things up, one should make the most of it. Today that meant just rocking up and seeing whatever was about to start, and that is how I watched the fantastic film today.

So, to set the scene, Samuel Murphy (Ethan Hawke) ends up in a hard labour camp after punching a man who menaced his daughter (Avy Berry) who turned out to be a cop. Samuel works hard because he needs to get back to his daughter before they adopt her out. But he can’t do that in time, which is where the Warden, Clancy (Russell Crowe), has a plan. He has a friend, Taggert (Alec Newman), that needs four men for a task, and if they pull it off, he will sign Samuel’s release papers. Samuel, Rankin (Austin Amelio), Singh (Avi Nash), and Olson (Lucas Lynggaard Tønnesen) make the trek deep into the Oregon wilderness. Taggert runs a gold mine, and it is about to be nationalised during the Great Depression. But the commodity they will be carrying is gold, and gold brings out the worst in people.

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Heart of the Beast – Movie Review

TL;DR – While there are times when you feel emotionally manipulated, I can’t deny that this film had a powerful effect on me, as each turn, setback, and revelation had me on the edge of my seat.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

A plane flies low over a valley.

Heart of the Beast Review Introduction

The last couple of years have been an odd time for David Ayer and me. I loved his The Beekeeper, a film that improves with each rewatching, and yet I loathed A Working Man, a film which was not improved by a repeat viewing. This was such an odd juxtaposition that was playing in my head as I sat down to watch his latest entry. But thankfully, I think we spent more time in the former than the latter territory.  

So, to set the scene, James Belmont (Brad Pitt) is a now-retired Special Forces officer who lives a quiet life with his retired combat scout dog Odin (Uber). They both live with the scars of their former life, both external and internal. One weekend, Belmont flies the two of them up into the Alaskan wilderness to camp, fish, and enjoy nature away from other humans. Some unwanted surprise company aside, it was a great trip, until a storm blows in and they have to pack up early. But when tragedy strikes on the flight home, Belmont and Odin must hike over fifty miles through the unforgiving Alaskan countryside to make it to the nearest road, the only hope for rescue.

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Resident Evil (2026) – Movie Review

TL;DR – Blood, Gore, Screams, Gunshots, and that is just the first ten minutes

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

Warning – Contains scenes which may cause distress.

Warning – Contains scenes with flashing lights.

Hands and feet spall out from a door.

Resident Evil Review Introduction

Today we are looking at a very interesting film, a grounded take on a surreal world. Growing up, even though we were not a PlayStation family, you knew of Resident Evil from sheer reputation alone. One of the pillars of horror gaming. I even liked the Resident Evil and Resident Evil: Apocalypse films back in the day, though by the time of Resident Evil: The Final Chapter it was clearly shambling along to the finish line. That is a lot of baggage for a film, but add Zach Cregger fresh off Weapons into the mix, and suddenly you have the potential for something truly fascinating. 

So, to set the scene, it has been a very long day for Bryan (Austin Abrams), who is trying to make money as a medical courier. He thought he was done for the day, but then a last-minute package for Raccoon City General Hospital arrived, and that was a job he could not turn down. It is a hard drive as a blizzard rolls in; he was distracted so much so that he didn’t even see the figure on the road until his car hit it at speed. This would have been disastrous, but then why won’t the police pick up? Why does this house look like a fight has just happened? And why is that very dead lady now running at full speed towards me?  

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Forgotten Island – Movie Review

TL;DR – The ending might be messy, but you cannot deny the charm and style that is throughout the film.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no end-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

A charm bracelet.

Forgotten Island Review Introduction

Today I get to dive into a world that I have not experienced before. Through my work and study, I am familiar with a lot of the world’s mythologies, but not with the myths of the Philippines. This does mean I won’t be critiquing in this review how well they represent that mythology, but it does mean that I get the joy of new experiences.
 
So, to set the scene, Jo (H.E.R.) and Raissa (Liza Soberano) have been friends since they were kids because no matter how different they are, they share a love for mythology, and a care for each other. The bonds of friendship run deep, but they get a major test when Raissa is accepted into CalTech in America. It is the last day they will be together when Jo finds a star in the ocean creating a portal to a new world. The two girls wake up 12 hours later with no memory of the night before and the realisation that they have both lost their only way home, and upset Manang (Lea Salonga), the Dreaded Manananggal, the one creature you never want to upset.

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Seven Snipers – Movie Review

TL;DR – A film about snipers should be tense, not dull.

Rating: 2 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid for the Netflix subscription used to watch this film.

A car in the target of a sniper scope.

Seven Snipers Review Introduction

As we continue to catch up on releases before the end-of-year onslaught happens, there is one Australian film from earlier this year that I wanted to get my eyes on. Conceptually, the idea of multiple snipers facing off against each other deep in the Australian bush is something that you have to see.  

So, to set the scene, Chris Hendrix (Radha Mitchell) lives deep in rural Australia with her daughter Anja (Annabel Wolfe). Chris is a little high-strung, which of course is perfect fodder for a rebellious teenager. However, Chris is not just some normal strict parent; she is a former special forces operator who has been living in hiding after antagonising the ruthless Dragon. But when a local real estate agent turns out to be an assassin, Chris realises that after decades, the Dragon has found her. Calling in backup, Chris hopes to get in front of this when her daughter runs away, and then the bodies start dropping.    

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Hope (Hopeu/호프) – Movie Review

TL;DR – This is honestly one of the most bonkers films I have ever watched, both good [the action] and bad [the animation], and everything in between [the tonal whiplash].

Rating: 4 out of 5.

And/Or

Rating: 2 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is a mid-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid to watch this film.

Two men stand on either side of a creature sized hole that has been made in the wall of a building.

Hope Review Introduction

Today we are looking at a profoundly odd film, a film that bamboozles and weirds you out in equal measures. I will be honest: I spent the entire time I was watching this film on the edge of my seat, not knowing what would come next, good or bad. It constantly keeps you off balance, not knowing what will happen next.  

So, to set the scene, Ko Bum-seok (Hwang Jung-min) is the police chief of Hope Harbour, a town in South Korea near the border with the North. Early one morning, he is called out of town by his cousin Ko Sung-ki (Zo In-sung), where they find a large bull that has been eviscerated by something larger than a bear. Concerned that a wild animal is this close to the town, Ko Bum-seok makes his way back into town to try and organise patrols to keep people safe, which is when explosions and screams cry out into the early morning.

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Practical Magic 2 Review – Movie Review

TL;DR – For me, the sequel improves on the narrative while bringing the charm in spades.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Warning – Contains scenes which may cause distress.

Xolo Maridueña on the ground after being hit by a car.

Practical Magic 2 Review Introduction

Well, it’s time for round two when it comes to magical adaptations. I was not sure what to expect when I sat down to watch the first Practical Magic yesterday. But joyfully messy was not on my list, which makes me wonder how it will hold up to a sequel all these years later.

So, to set the scene, Sally (Sandra Bullock) and Gilly (Nicole Kidman) are sisters, with their aunts Frances (Stockard Channing) and Jet (Dianne Wiest), from the infamous Owens family. The whole town thinks they are witches; well, that is because they are. Twenty-five years after the first film, Sally’s elder daughter Kylie (Joey King) is discovering that the family curse might not be all done and dusted when her boyfriend Gideon (Xolo Maridueña) is gravely injured. This leads to a flight to England to try and break the curse once and for all. 

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