Smurfs (2025) – Movie Review

TL;DR – A complete mess of a film that fundamentally does not understand who it wants to be for, and in its attempt to be for everyone, it becomes a movie for no one.

Rating: 2 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is a mid-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

Warning – There are sequences with flashing lights.

Smurfette.

Smurfs Review

Sometimes, as a reviewer, you have to contend with reviewing films that you are clearly not the target demographic for, where you need to pull yourself out of the setting for a bit and experience it like the intended audience. But that all depends on one thing: the film actually working with the people they want it to.

So, to set the scene, a long time ago, four evil wizards captured four magical books and tried to steal all that is good in the world, but luckily, one of the books escaped and the spell was ruined. Some time later, all the Smurfs of Smurf village have come together to sing their daily song. But there is one Smurf out of sync: No Name Smurf (James Corden). Smurfette (Rihanna) tries to help No Name Smurf to find his thing, when even Shark Trainer Smurf was taken. However, as they were getting Smurfberries, No Name Smurf finds his secret talent, magic. But there has never been a Magic Smurf, and we find out why when a magical pulse tips off Razamel (JP Karliak) as to where Smurf Village is, and he captures Papa Smurf (John Goodman) so he can tell him where the last book is. Now the Smurfs have to go on a rescue mission to save Papa Smurf and the whole world.

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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters – Beyond Logic & Season 1 – TV Review

TL;DR – It may have left the best for last as it ratchets up the tension and the monsters.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Disclosure – I paid for the Apple TV+ service that viewed this series.

Godzilla surfaces.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Review

Well, we have reached the end of our first season of Monarch: Legacy of Monsters, and what a fascinating season it was. We got governmental intrigue, timey-wimey physics, and also some giant roar monsters. In our final update for the season, we are first going to take a look at whether they stuck the landing in this final episode and then also how well the season worked as a whole.

So, to set the scene, At the end of Axis Mundi, everything went wrong. The monsters attacked the old nuclear plant in Kazakhstan, setting off the explosions, and throwing Cate (Anna Sawai), May (Kiersey Clemons), and Shaw (Kurt Russell) into the portal and badly wounding Kentaro (Ren Watabe) and Tim (Joe Tippett). Cate thought she was going to die. The last thing she expected to find was herself alive in the underworld or that the person who would come to her rescue was none other than her grandmother Keiko (Mari Yamamoto), who had not aged a day. We will be looking at the episode and season as a whole from here, so there will be some [SPOILERS] ahead. 

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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters – The Way Out – TV Review

TL;DR – This is the first week where we have an almost restrained jump around the timeline.  

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Disclosure – I paid for the Apple TV+ service that viewed this series.

Monarch holding facility in Alaska.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Review

It has been a couple of good years for Godzilla, and this year has been no exception. But coming off the hot heals of the delightful Godzilla Minus One, we dive back into the world of intrigue and more than a bit of family dysfunction.

So to set the scene, at the end of Parallels and Interiors, Cate Randa (Anna Sawai), Kentaro Randa (Ren Watabe), May (Kiersey Clemons), and an old Lee Shaw (Kurt Russell) got rescued by the skin of their teeth just before they became titan food, or just succumb to the Alaskan Cold. The only issue is that their rescuers were Monarch who imprisoned them. Deputy Director Natalia Verdugo (Mirelly Taylor) and Duvall (Elisa Lasowski) wonder just what to do with the group and decide to let them go with a long leach to see what they dig up. Well, one quick trip from Nome, Alaska, to the ruins of San Fransisco because if their father had one secret office, he might have a second. We will be looking at the episode as a whole from here, so there will be some [SPOILERS] ahead. 

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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters – Parallels and Interiors – TV Review

TL;DR – This is the first week where we have an almost restrained jump around the timeline.  

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Disclosure – I paid for the Apple TV+ service that viewed this series.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Review

After racing forward, you need to consolidate your gains or at least reveal some of the cards you are working with. For Monarch: Legacy of Monsters, that time is now, because things are starting to hit the fan.  

So to set the scene, we open in on Utah, 2015, where Barnes is sitting watch at Outpost 47, and some weird beeping comes from her equipment, a piece of equipment that should not be getting set off. Coincidently, at the end of Secrets and Lies, Cate Randa (Anna Sawai), Kentaro Randa (Ren Watabe), May (Kiersey Clemons), and an old Lee Shaw (Kurt Russell) come face to face with a monster that breathes cold air, and it is not happy they just landed on its mountain. We will be looking at the episode as a whole from here, so there will be some [SPOILERS] ahead. 

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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters – Secrets and Lies – TV Review

TL;DR – After grounding our story, we start escalating this week.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Disclosure – I paid for the Apple TV+ service that viewed this series.

a cammera lens

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Review

While I did not attend this to happen, this week has been very MonsterVerse-focused, with us exploring the first episodes of Monarch, as well as a dive back to the original 2014 Godzilla film that set this universe off (only this cinematic universe, I know Godzilla has had several of them in its lifetime). Well, all good things have to come to an end, well, an end till we come back next week, but it is time to look at the third episode of this opening bunch when things start unravelling fast.  

So to set the scene, at the end of Departure, Cate Randa (Anna Sawai), Kentaro Randa (Ren Watabe), and May (Kiersey Clemons) found an old Lee Shaw (Kurt Russell) living in a retirement home. However, it was not just an average home for the elderly. It was also a Monarch prison facility. Well, a short tour and a cut ankle monitor later and Shaw escapes, and well, if Monarch was not after them before, they sure are now. We will be looking at the episode as a whole from here, so there will be some [SPOILERS] ahead. 

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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters – Departure – TV Review

TL;DR – The mystery starts to catch up with people as enemies loom over the secrets of Monarch.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Disclosure – I paid for the Apple TV+ service that viewed this series.

USS Lawton

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Review

In the last episode with Aftermath, we got to dip our toes into this multi-generation mystery surrounding the Monarch organisation, the group behind monitoring/studying/controlling/exploiting the Kaiju of the MonsterVerse. It was enough to intrigue, but today’s episode needs to take it up a notch, which it does.

So to set the scene, we open in Manila, 1952, as Lt Shaw (Wyatt Russell) sporting a shiner on his left eye. When he is given a mission by General Puckett (Christopher Heyerdahl) to escort a Japanese scientist on a mission, some awkward introductions later, he and Keiko Miura (Mari Yamamoto) are crashing through the jungles of Mindoro hunting down odd radiation. Meanwhile, back in 2015 Tokyo, the revelations that Hiroshi Randa (Takehiro Hira) had two families echoed through the lives of Cate Randa (Anna Sawai) and Kentaro Randa (Ren Watabe). We will be looking at the episode as a whole from here, so there will be some [SPOILERS] ahead. 

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Movie Review – Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

TL;DR – Volume 2 takes everything from the first film and elevates it with an interesting story, beautiful visuals, and some of the best humour in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but your mileage may vary depending on a couple of factors.

Score – 4.5 out of 5 stars

P.S. There are 5 mid/post credit scenes

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2. Image Credit: Marvel/Disney.

Review

Back in 2014 Marvel undertook the biggest experiment yet in this whole expanded universe, it was an ensemble cast which they had not done outside of an Avengers film at that point, its main lead was still a mostly unknown Chris Pratt. Seriously when he was cast he was mostly known as that quirky dude on Parks and Rec, two of the main cast were CGI and one of those only said I am Groot and it was amazing. It was funny, but emotional at places and that opening still makes me tear up, and until Captain America Civil War came along it was my favourite film in the MCU, or maybe still is, I go back and forth a bit here. So it would not be a surprise to say that Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 might be the film I was the most looking forward to in 2017. Now this as a reviewer is something you have to be careful with, you need to make sure your rose-tinted glasses are not blinding you to the flaws, or conversely that you don’t hype it up so much that it is a disappointment no matter how good it is. But I have just come from the cinemas and overall I really loved Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, but I can also see areas that may put people off. So with this in mind let’s start the review.

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Movie Review – The Fate of the Furious (Fast and Furious 8)


TL;DR
– The Fate of the Furious is a stupid dumb film, but it’s also a bunch of fun and downright heart-warming in places.

Score – 3.5 out of 5 stars

The Fate of the Furious (Fast and Furious 8). Image Credit: Universal.

Review
Ok so we need to acknowledge straight from the start that this is the eighth film in the Fast in the Furious franchise, that’s a real accomplishment and puts it tied with Star Wars which is not mean feat, but it still has a bit to go to catch up with Star Trek, Marvel, Bond, and wait what Air Bud, really, there have been fourteen of them, goodness. Ok wait, we went off on a tangent there, ok where were we, oh yes eight films, it is a real achievement, and means that they are doing something right. However, to be honest for me I have not watched any since the 2nd back in the day, because they kept taking this ridiculous premise and playing it completely seriously and it just grated on me. But given that this is film number eight and given that this franchise has become one of the biggest in modern filmmaking I thought I’d give it another go, and wow was I pleasantly surprised. So going into the eighth film in a franchise there are some things that you can expect before the opening titles roll, there will be a lot of fast cars, a lot of women in tight clothing, a metric ass-ton of machismo, and oh, also a completely on point James Bond narrative, ok I was actually not expecting that last one but there it is and it was a pleasant surprise. It is really fascinating to jump back in after all this time and see just how much the series has evolved, but also how in many ways it has really not changed much at all. So in today’s review, we are going to look at the story, the characters, the action, as well as a couple of other tidbits.

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