TL;DR – What an awful steaming pile of effluent this move was, at best it is lazy, at worse it is deeply problematic, don’t waste your money on this.
Score – 1 out of 5 stars
Review –
Dirty Grandpa is a film about a recent widower taking his grandson on a trip to Daytona Beach, there is more to the story, but I could not be bothered to explain it.
TL;DR – This is a real life story that needed to be told, of scumbags who hurt children and them covered it up, I just wish it had been done a bit better.
Score – 4 out of 5 stars
Review –
Spotlight is the real life story of the Spotlight team of The Boston Globe. This is a team of investigative journalists who pick their own stories to investigate, sometimes spending years researching their cases. In early 2001 after some prompting, they start looking into the Catholic Church in the Boston area and how they handled sexual abuse cases. Here they discover that it is not just a couple of bad apples and that it is a much bigger problem, one the Church knew about and one they covered up.
TL;DR – A beautiful film in a certain respect, filled with Tarantino’s trademark gore but not a whole lot of anything else
Score – 2 out of 5 stars
Review –
So two of the three films I have seen this year have been set in the snowy reaches of frontier America, both contain people battling against the elements and a lot of blood, violence and unsettling themes. However, while I walked out of The Revenant feeling that I had witnessed something truly remarkable, when I walked out of The Hateful Eight I felt, “well, yer, that was a thing”.
TL;DR – A simple paint by numbers comedy, funny but ultimately a bit disappointing
Score – 2.5 out of 5 stars
Review –
I went and watched Sisters right after The Revenant, as a way to decompress after that spectacle of filmmaking. Given that both Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are incredible comedians separately and together they are amazing I had really high expectations for Sisters. So was it funny, well in places yes it was, but it was also comedy paint by numbers, where you can chart the course of the film after about 20 minutes in.
TL;DR – Bleak but Beautiful, Though provoking but brutal, Heart-wrenching but uplifting, One of the most visually stunning films I have ever seen but one I don’t think I ever want to watch again
Score – 4 out of 5 stars
Review –
Wow, the first movie for the year and boy is this an amazing work of art, this is a movie that is at times hauntingly beautiful and at other times horrifically brutal, this is not a film to take your children to, there are vivid violence and some very disturbing scenes. The Revenant is fictional retelling of the real life story of Hugh Glass (Leonardo DiCaprio) who was left for dead after being mauled by a grizzly bear and has to try and survive in the barren frozen wastelands of (the now) The United States of America fighting his own body, the elements, and the indigenous population.
TL;DR – “Sing Hallelujah!, Sing it, Sing Hallelujah!, Sing it, yeah, Sing Hallelujah! … Sing Hallelujah!” – Dr. Alban
Score – 4.5 out of 5 stars
Review –
Ok before we start I am going to try my best to have no spoilers in this review, but you should be warned that while I may try my best there may be a couple of little tidbits throughout this review. Anyway, this is a great film and you should go into with as little information as possible, go see it before someone spoils it for you.
TL;DR – Wow what a surprize, did not see that coming, one of my movies of the year.
Score – 4.5 out of 5 stars
Review –
So cards on the table, I was not planning to go see Creed. I never really watch the Rocky films, they were always a little before my time and didn’t get the same reruns on TV like movies such as Die Hard. That being said, I know most of the main plot points through clips here and there, impersonations and parodies etc. So not seeing any of the others, combined with it being a sports film, a genre I don’t generally like and the last movie I saw Michael B Jordan in Fantastic Four (see review), his acting was so wooden he could give Chris Pine a run for his money, was a perfect storm of meh, can’t be bothered. But a number of people recommended it to me, and I am glad they did because boy was I wrong.
TL;DR – This movie is trying to be a lot of things, but never really succeeds at any of them
Score – 2 out of 5 stars
Review –
So we have hit December and that means that Christmas movies are upon us, and the first cab off the rank this year is The Night Before, so how is it, well, meh. To try and explain this film, imagine taking the comedic sensibilities of a usual Seth Rogan production (see Bad Neighbours, This is the End & The Interview) and smash it together with the iconography and themes of traditional Christmas movie. This is an interesting concept, but in practice, we get a slapdash amalgamation of the two rather than an interesting hybrid.
Continue readingTL;DR – Not as good as Skyfall in any real respect, but much better than Quantum of Solace
Score – 2.5 out of 5 stars
Review –
If I had been reviewing Spectre right after Quantum of Solace I think I would have been much more favourable to it, simply because any Bond film has to be better than that mess. However, between now and then we’ve had Skyfall, which ditched all the story baggage they had been building upon for a standalone Bond adventure and it was a much better film. Alas Spectre decides you know what’s good let’s go back to all that lore we were building up ‘cause you know what people loved that. Ok look it is not that bad, there are some really great moments, there is just a lot of faff you have to get through as well.
TL;DR – Honestly a bit of a disappointment
Score – 2.5 out of 5 stars
Review –
I honestly don’t know where this film went wrong, it has a good cast, it clearly has talent working behind the scenes and it has an interesting premise, but in the end, it kind of feels like we have a movie that is just paint by numbers.
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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong
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freelance film critic with an interest in multilingualism, feminist perspectives in cinema and crime dramas.
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