Fuze – Movie Review

TL;DR – A profoundly fascinating heist film that never lets you settle as it shifts under your feet.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid for the Amazon Prime subscription used to watch this film.

The bomb starts ticking.

Fuze Review Introduction

Sometimes you sit down and have a feeling that you need to watch something you have not seen in a while, and for me that was a good heist film. I love the tension, the precision, the action; every part of a good heist is a delight, and I think we got a good one today.   

So, to set the scene, it’s construction time in London, England, and when digging out the foundation of a building, the diggers hit something you don’t want to find: an unexploded 500lb bomb left from WWII. It is one of those things that can shut an entire city down, as people must evacuate the potential blast zone. The Army, under Major Will Tranter (Aaron Taylor-Johnson), has been brought in to deal with the bomb while the police evacuate the city around it. But with entire blocks of London evacuated, and no one watching, that leaves an awful lot of unintended valuables lying around, and a lot of false alarms going off while hiding what you are doing.

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Greenland 2: Migration – Movie Review

TL;DR – A quasi-religious themed sequel doesn’t live up to the first film, unfortunately.

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid for the Amazon Prime subscription used to watch this film.

John escapes from a radiation storm.

Greenland 2: Migration Review Introduction

Back in 2021, I was entirely surprised by a film. Greenland took what could have been a run-of-the-mill disaster/apocalypse film and filled it with real emotional weight. It even made it onto my best film list for that year. Since then, I have been wondering if they would go back to that world, and while we didn’t get an Australian release, I am glad to finally be getting a look at it today.  

So, to set the scene, in the five years since the Clarke devastation, fragments still impact the Earth, causing all sorts of radiation issues. John Garrity (Gerard Butler), his family, Allison (Morena Baccarin), and Nathan (Roman Griffin Davis) are still living in the bunker under Thule Airbase in Greenland. But things have stretched on longer than anyone expected, and they are now surviving by salvaging the ruins of humanity that wash up. The hope was to wait for the radiation levels to drop, but already large areas of North America have been made uninhabitable due to it. But when the tectonic plates shift and the base is destroyed, the Garrity family and the handful of survivors must make a mad dash across a waring Europe to reach the Clarke creator, the one place potentially free of radiation.  

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28 Years Later: The Bone Temple – Movie Review

TL;DR – An incredibly confronting film that made me regret eating dinner but reveals a wealth of thematic depth beneath the gore.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I paid for the Amazon Prime subscription used to watch this film.

Warning – Contains scenes that may cause distress.

The Bone Temple at dusk.

28 Years Later: The Bone Temple Review Introduction

Today we’re looking at an unusual sequel. After decades of waiting for 28 Years Later, The Bone Temple arrived so quickly afterwards that some audiences may have assumed it was the same film. I tried to watch it in cinemas, but the scheduling never worked out. But now it’s out on streaming, it’s time to give it a watch.

So, to set the scene, we open in the moments after the end of 28 Years Later with Spike (Alfie Williams) having to fight for his life in front of Jimmy (Jack O’Connell) and his cult of Jimmies. Meanwhile, around the Bone Temple, Dr Kelson (Ralph Fiennes) has made some odd discoveries about Sampson (Chi Lewis-Parry) that the alpha might indeed be his friend, or more importantly, the real person might still be in there. There is a bit of assumed knowledge going into this film, as it does expect that you have watched the previous film.

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Enola Holmes 3 – Movie Review

TL;DR – This is one of the films where the presentation almost makes up for the lack of narrative substance, almost.

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure –I paid for the Netflix service that viewed this film.

Enola looks through a porthole.

Enola Holmes 3 Review Introduction

I think one of those rare lingering joys of this streaming era is when they go full tilt into an odd concept with full vigour. One of these rare examples is the Enola Holmes series. Every few years, Millie Bobby Brown gets to pop into some amusing action and talk to the camera like she was auditioning for The Office, and it has been a delight. I quite liked Enola Holmes and Enola Holmes 2, so let’s see if the third film sticks the landing.   

So, to set the scene, in a beautiful cathedral in the heart of Malta, there is a wedding incoming. One slight problem: the bride is having second thoughts, mainly about losing her identity. Or at least the name on which she had built everything. But as Enola (Millie Bobby Brown) makes her way through the countryside to Tewkesbury (Louis Partridge), she is intercepted by Dr Watson (Himesh Patel) to inform her that Sherlock (Henry Cavill) is missing, not just missing, but kidnapped.  

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Finding Emily – Movie Review

TL;DR – An oddly charming film that transcends some of the potential limitations by grounding the characters in a clear sense of time and place.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is a mid-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

A poster with "Missing, 

A Digit of Emily's Number!,

you gave me 10/11th's of your number on MONDAY

you were a FAIRY

I was the guy with no bottle opener who'd really like to see you again

Meet ME Where you found me ANY NIGHT 7pm"

Finding Emily Review Introduction

When you have been writing reviews for a while, one of the issues that comes up is that you tend to have seen everything under the sun already. It is like that friend who always knows who the murderer is five minutes into a murder mystery. However, every now and again, a film will catch you off guard, and that is what we are looking at today.   

So, to set the scene, Owen (Spike Fearn) is a caring guy trying to make a life as a sound engineer when one night at a club he is working in, he runs into Emily (Sadie Soverall). They immediately hit it off with an almost electric chemistry. To the point he almost loses his job from having a good time. But late at night, before the clock struck 12, Emily had to run off with her friends to another party, but since they were having such fun, she put her number in Owen’s phone. The next morning, Owen’s brother, Matt (Jack Riddiford) and his partner, Freya (Isabella Laughland), did find a bit of glee when Owen discovered Emily had only given her 10 of the 11 digits of her phone number. But Owen was determined, and Manchester is a university town, so someone must know who she is, right? His first attempt was a failure, but Emily Raine (Angourie Rice) was nice enough to help him on his mission, but her motives might not be all that altruistic.

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The Sheep Detectives – Movie Review

TL;DR – Who knew if you smashed Knives Out into Chicken Run, you would create something so profoundly charming.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is a post-credit audio sting, but you don’t need to stay for it.

Disclosure – I paid to watch this film.

A sheep swings in a tire.

The Sheep Detectives Review Introduction

It has been a long time since a film charmed me to the core. However, that is just what happened today. Look, if you told me at the start of the year that a Hugh Jackman sheep film would be scoring high on my end-of-the-year list, I would have called you foolish. But the only fool would have been past-me, and present-me is already quite annoyed at past-me, so we can just add this to the list.  

So, to set the scene, in the charming little English town of Denbrook, lives a farmer called George (Hugh Jackman) and his flock of sheep. George loves all his sheep equally and gave them all names, because they are all special. But he also feels that Lily (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) and Sebastian (Bryan Cranston) are the most special. Everything was going swimmingly at the farm, bar all these weird grudges that seemed to have come out of nowhere. However, one night, after reading the sheep their nighttime story, Lily woke to find George lying in the field dead … murdered. Was it the besmirched innkeeper Beth Pennock (Hong Chau), the failed shepherd Caleb (Tosin Cole), the duplicitous priest Reverend Hillcoate (Kobna Holdbrook-Smith), the grumpy butcher Ham Gilyard (Conleth Hill), or the mysterious Rebecca Hampstead (Molly Gordon)? Whatever the case, the sheep can’t leave the case to local police officer Tim Derry (Nicholas Braun), because he is plainly useless. No, if someone is going to step up and solve this murder, it is going to be someone with four hooves, copious wool, and a penchant for baaing.   

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The Magic Faraway Tree – Movie Review

TL;DR – While the story has little depth, you can’t help but get caught up in the wonder of this fantastic world.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is a mid-credit scene, and an end-credit sting, but you don’t need to stay for the end.

Disclosure – I paid to watch this film.

The family coming over a rise.

The Magic Faraway Tree Review Introduction

Today, we look at a very peculiar film. In talking with people, it’s clear that the original Enid Blyton stories hold a special nostalgic place in many childhoods. I didn’t read it as a child, so I’m not coming into this film with those baked-in feelings. On the plus side, I don’t have those years of built-in wonder that could be devastated by changes in the story, but then I don’t have that connection built in, ready to engage that suspension of belief from the outset. That history is what frames my experience with the film today.   

So, to set the scene, Tim (Andrew Garfield) and Polly Thompson (Claire Foy) are trying to raise their family, Beth (Delilah Bennett-Cardy), Fran (Billie Gadsdon) & Joe (Phoenix Laroche), in a modern world that fosters disconnection. When Polly gets fired from her job, because she discovered her Fridge (Judi Dench) project was being used nefariously, the family comes to a crossroads. Taking a gamble, they dive into the wilderness of the English countryside, to the village of Netherbridge, to live out one of their dreams in their dream journal. The kids are not a fan of their new barn house, which does not have electricity, let alone wi-fi. But when Fran gets an invitation to visit the enchanted woods, which everyone says is dangerous, well, she can’t help but see what is there to discover.

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Anemone – Movie Review

TL;DR – While the scenery is stunning, the cast is giving their all, and the themes they are exploring are quite important. Unfortunately, Anemone is a victim of the whole not being as good as the sum of its parts.

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

Warning – This film contains scenes which may cause distress.

A man looking out to a storm coming in over the ocean.

Anemone Review Introduction –

Let’s be honest, there is a lot I could say here in my opening paragraph as to what made me want to watch this film. However, we all know why you are immediately captivated by this slightly odd film; it is because Daniel Day-Lewis came out of retirement to star in one more movie. No matter what else is happening, that makes it a must-watch.

So, to set the scene, we open with Jem Stoker (Sean Bean) making the long trek into the wilderness of England looking for his brother Ray Stoker (Daniel Day-Lewis). Twenty years ago, Ray left his house and his pregnant wife Nessa Stoker (Samantha Morton) to build a life in isolation. Well, now his son Brian Stoker (Samuel Bottomley) is in trouble because the absence of his father has followed him around wherever he goes, and Jem hopes that bringing Ray back to speak with Brian will stop the boy from going down a dark path.  

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“Wuthering Heights” (2026) – Movie Review

TL;DR – I truly do not know who this film is for. It is an unpleasant experience for those who have never read the novel, and changes so much from the source material that it would be alienating for those who loved it.

Rating: 1.5 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was invited to a press screening of this film.

Warning – This film contains scenes which may cause distress.

Cathy in a wedding dress flowing along the moors.

Wuthering Heights Review Introduction

Okay, I feel like this is one of those films where I need to clarify where I am coming from here. When I was growing up, there were a number of classics on the curriculum, but my school didn’t dive into the works of the Brontë sisters. So, it didn’t form a strong bond with me when I was young. Now, don’t get me wrong, I do not dismiss those who did form a bond because if someone did a film of Dinotopia and botched it, I would also be mad. However, I’m coming into this film without those built-up expectations, for better or worse. [Editor’s Note: It would not have helped either way]

So, to set the scene, Cathy (Charlotte Mellington) is the only daughter of a drunkard fool, Mr Earnshaw (Martin Clunes), who once owned considerable land and prestige but has both figuratively and metaphorically pissed all that away through gambling debts. Cathy has one companion, Nelly (Vy Nguyen), who is, retrospectively, more of a paid lady-in-waiting than a friend. But her life changes when her father brings a boy home, who is given the name Heathcliff (Owen Cooper). They become a fast pair in a land of isolation. But years later, the adult [and probably too old for the source material] Cathy (Margot Robbie) is joyous to hear that they finally have a new neighbour, Edgar Linton (Shazad Latif). While Nelly (Hong Chau) advises against it, and Heathcliff (Jacob Elordi) clearly does not want her to go, Cathy goes to visit the new family, but one sprained ankle changes everyone’s lives.   

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Lord of Misrule – Movie Review

TL;DR – While it nails the vibes of a film in this space, it didn’t capture me with its narrative, creating a chasm that I could not parse.

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.

Disclosure – I was sent a screener of this film.

A town dances around fires.

Lord of Misrule Review Introduction

I think one of the most possibly terrifying issues a parent could face is a child going missing. I mean, I lost track of my nephew in an IKEA for thirty seconds, and it was terrifying. That pain of not knowing, the loss of all that is dear. It is in that space full of folk-horror tones that we find ourselves today.

So, to set the scene, deep in the countryside, there is the village of Berrow, where church organs still bellow out their ancient chords. The new vicar, Rebecca Holland (Tuppence Middleton), is trying to find her place in a village with an old soul that runs deep. But their world is turned upside down when her daughter Grace (Evie Templeton) is chosen as the ‘Harvest Angel’ and then disappears at the local festival. No one knows where she went, but Rebecca saw her led into the forest by a demon, or someone dressed as one, not that anyone believes her.  

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